Whew!

Well, we've been super busy the last couple of weeks... busy getting over a nasty virus that we acquired somewhere and unwittingly passed on to an unfortunately large number of people while we were at Ozark Family Camp. Ellie got pneumonia, and we had mulitple ear infections as a side benefit of this beauty. All 10 of us got it to one degree or another, and a couple are still pretty puny. So, that's taken a bulk of my energy recently, and I haven't gotten to the many update posts that I'd like to write sometime. But we're on our way out of it!

A few bits of other recent news:

Today is my fourth day in my Shampoo Free experience. I'm having a bit of a "transition" issue, but not bad. I'll be posting more about it; this is just a teaser. Follow the link above if you're curious, and if you have thoughts on going "shampoo free," I'd love to read them.

We did our first bit of canning today! I was amazed at how much the tomatoes cooked down in the method we used, but it was relatively easy and I hear it gets great results. Jonathan and I blanched the tomatoes, the big boys peeled and diced, Jonathan and I did the actually canning.Red, purple, and orange tomatoes. The partially filled jar will just go in the fridge when it cools. Our purples aren't doing great this year for some reason, so we didn't have many. On the counter behind the jars are some not-quite-ripe goodies.

I've been working on updating my photo blog... I was almost two months behind, but have made some catch-up progress in the last week - up to July 8th right now. And speaking of blogging, I'm getting ready to move to Wordpress. Not quite ready, but getting closer. That also has taken up some of my available computer time. I'll let you know the new place is all ready for visitors.

100 Toes

I was amazed tonight by the realization that we are a family of one hundred toes. I'm feeling overwhelmedly thankful tonight for my wonderful husband and the eight lives God has entrusted to our care.

The Father has been steadily renewing my affection for my children lately. In the busy-ness and challenges of my pregnancy, I had gotten into a rut that found me not treasuring my Blessings. Or perhaps I wasn't treasuring them before the pregnancy and had not realized it. But my heart is being drawn back into communion with these precious lives God has given us, and I'm thankful.

Last Monday (June 7), I began a new phase of life that is helping to facilitate my desire to draw closer in heart with my children. The internet is now considered to be "off" to me during the day while Jonathan is gone to work. And this decision is helping me to change my life.

The first couple of days of this new habit brought the head-bowing realization that I would have to go slowly as I worked my way back into my children's daily lives. My pregnancy was quite debilatating physically, and I ended up spending most of my time in my room. My children became acustomed to me not being around very much. But we're changing that for the better, and while I still have a long ways to go (and always will, because that's the way growth works), I am thankful to find my relationships with my children growing and deepening.

The Father seems to be working on my heart in a lot of other areas right now, including toward my beloved man, but instead of typing more, I think I'll get off the computer and get back to my family. Tonight is Davey's birthday party and our traditional Friday night family late night. Fun times!

Birthday Season Has Begun!

Note: I finished this post and thought I had posted it yesterday, but discovered today that it hadn't posted (or saved my final draft). So here's another try.

Andrew's arrival on May 1 extended birthday season by one month. Prior to his arrival, all of our birthdays fell between June 1 and September 8. Birthday season is full of fun, good food, and lots of cake and ice cream!

This year we are spreading out the four June birthday parties by celebrating them on the four weekends. The birthday person will still get to request the dinner of their choice on their actual birthday, and the cake of their choice for their party. Should be fun!

Our sweet Grace turned 7 on Tuesday. You can read the story of her birth here and here, if you like birth stories. We are so thankful for Grace and the joy that she brings to our family.

Grace's requested birthday dinner was chicken salad and refried beans - what a combination. We added in peas, corn, and grape tomatoes. Josiah, Barak, and I also made a cheesecake on Tuesday that we baked in two pie pans; we had one on Grace's birthday and one on Stephen's.
Happy Birthday, Grace!


And Stephen turned 3 on Wednesday! I haven't managed to get his birth story written out yet, but maybe in the next year I'll get it done. This little guy gives us many chuckles and much sunshine.

The first word out of Stephen's mouth when asked what he wanted for his birthday meal? Salad! And he meant it; the boy loves salad and will usually eat it first if it is available. We rounded out his meal with pizza, which was his second request.
Happy Birthday, Stephen!

Stephen's Creed

Here are the lyrics:

I believe there's only one God, and He's a trinity
The Father, Son, and Spirit, Almighty God is He
I believe He's the Creator, by Him were all things made
He knows all and He's holy; forever He's the same.
But you and I are sinners so God sent His only Son
To be born of a virgin, He's God and man in one.
I believe for my salvation Christ suffered and He died,
He rose again the third day and lives in heaven on high.

Early Weeks This and That

(Edited to show the correct "publish" date. Started this on 5/6, but didn't finish until 5/11)

Have I told you lately that I have the most wonderful husband on the planet? God sure knew what He was doing when He overruled our shared thought that we would Never end up together. From his gentle encouragement while I was giving birth to Andrew, to the countless ways he has served me without any complaint, I am thankful.

The first couple of weeks after birth are often challenging for me emotionally. I'm doing pretty well this time. I think one reason for that is the realization that staying bouyant is not accidental for me. If I do not make the conscious choices that help me stay bouyant, I will begin to sink. I'm thankful that the Lord is helping me remember to make those needed choices. Perhaps I'll write more on this later.

Dad and Mom Smith were gracious enough to come get the Blessings in the middle of the night Thursday night (Friday morning) and to take care of them until they brought them home Sunday afternoon to meet their new little brother. Many thanks to them.

My beloved Mama arrived last Tuesday, May 4. She is such a blessing to me! It is a treat to have someone who knows me well enough to anticipate my needs/wants, who sees the "tired" in my eyes and sends me to bed, who is a bosom friend, and... who is such a good cook! The Blessings have loved having G'ma around as well. Lots of game playing happening at our house these days! We are so thankful to Mama for coming to take care of us, and to Papa for doing without her while she's here.

Grace had been asking for weeks about when "our newborn baby" was going to be born. She still sometimes calls Andrew the "newborn baby." So sweet.

Stephen must have caught the "newborn baby" label from Grace. When they came home on Sunday afternoon, it took him a bit to warm up to this new person. But before long, he was sitting on our bed with Andrew in his lap. He looked up to tell me, "This is our newborn baby." Then again, with serious eyes, "Where did you find it?"

Stephen has already started bringing gifts to the newborn baby. I guess he knows Andrew is a boy... he brings me flowers, but he brings Andrew rocks.

Andrew has hair that is almost auburn (brownish with blond and red highlights), with a very interesting hair growth pattern. He has multiple cowlicks, two of which send his hairline above his forehead in two different directions. He also has some wave, so it will be fun to see how his hair looks in a few years.

The older Blessings are always ready for a turn holding Andrew. It is sweet to see their love for him.

Another interesting feature of Andrew's is his eyes. I realized several days ago that Andrew doesn't have blue eyes! Though the other Blessings eye color varies, they all started off with blue eyes. Not Andrew! It's hard to tell what color they are/will be, but they're not our typical deep baby blue. How fun!

Last week, Mama and the Blessings helped me with replanting our pepper seedlings. They had outgrown their peat pots, and it's a bit too early to put them out in the garden. They should make it till transplant time just fine in their new pots.

Enough of random thoughts... time for a snooze.

Mothers Day Thoughts of Gratitude

Years ago, I realized that Mothers Day was much more fun if I focused on being grateful for the gift of motherhood instead of focusing on what recognition/admiration/gifts I might receive. To me, Mothers Day has become "Thank God I'm a Mother! Day." It is also a great time to express my thankfulness to the mothers in my life, from my own Mama (the best on the planet!) to my mother-in-love, to the many women who have mothered me and/or taught me about mothering by example.

This morning, Andrew and I stayed home from meeting to rest, and I made some special bookmarks for our Blessings. Andrew doesn't have one yet, but I don't think he'll mind if I'm late. I thought I'd share the text from the bookmarks in a gratitude post.

Davey
I love watching the young man you are becoming as you grow toward manhood. Your love of reading and thirst for knowledge is a joy, and you are a terrific big brother to your siblings. I appreciate your thoughtfulness and consideration. I pray that you will continue to yield to the Lord and become a godly man who follows Him with all of your being. I thank God for the blessing of being your mother, Davey. I love you.


Barak
What a joy it is to watch you grow and to see your character develop. Your love for justice, your gentleness with the Littles, and your entrepreneurial spirit are just a few of the things I like about you. From the day you were born, I have looked forward to seeing what God will do with your lightening bolt spirit as you submit yourself to Him. I pray that as you grow into a man, you will give yourself even more fully to your Heavenly Father & His will for you. It is a blessing to be your mother, Barak. I love you and thank God for you.

Elanor
Your sweet and tender spirit is a delight to my heart, dear daughter. I love to watch you nurture your younger siblings. It is a joy to watch you growing into a young lady who wants to follow the Lord and who is learning to yield to Him and go to Him for help. To hear you singing “psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs” in the lovely voice the Lord has given you has encouraged my heart countless times. I pray you will yield to Him as He continues His work in your life. I thank God that He blesses me with being your mother, Elanor. I love you.

Josiah
What a delight it is to have your “ray of sunshine” self in our family. I enjoy your bright spirit, your love of fun, and your affectionate nature. As you grow toward manhood, I see God growing you into the man He wants to you be, teaching you the balance between the fun and the weighty. I pray that you will submit to Him as He makes you more like Jesus. You are a joy-bringer, and I thank God for the blessing of being your mother. I love you, Josiah.

A few of my favorite things about you, Katie:
~ You have a lovely smile that you share often.
~ You love to be outside enjoying God's creation.
~ You like to read, both to yourself and to your younger siblings.
~ You surprise me!
~ Your cuddles
I'm blessed to be your mama, Katie.
I love you!

A few of my favorite things about you, Grace:
~ You love to hug and cuddle.
~ You are funny.
~ You're a good helper.
~ You have a sweet smile and a loving heart.
~ You tell fun and interesting stories.
I'm blessed to be your mama, Gracie.
I love you!

A few of my favorite things about you, Stephen:
Your smile
Your hugs
Your kisses
Your voice - the way you say words like Amimal and Cupchup
Listening to you sing songs about Jesus
Stephen, I love you and I'm so glad to be your Mama.

I also made one for my precious Mama:

Mama
I am blessed beyond measure to have been given you for a mother.
Thank you for the example that you are to me of godly womanhood: as a wife, mother, sister, and daughter.
I see Jesus in and through you and am blessed & challenged.
Thank you for your unconditional and sacrificial love.
Thank you for being my friend, for lifting me up countless times, and being on my cheering squad no matter what.
I love you, Mama
Happy Mothers Day
May 9, 2010

This and That ... and lots of it!

I haven't been very good with blogging regularly about what's going on around here, so it's time for a This and That post...

Last month, Jonathan and I waited for a couple of hours in my backup OB's office, then saw him for less than 10 minutes. We only got as much of his time as we did because I kept asking him questions. I couldn't help but think, "and this is one of many reasons why we choose midwifery care." On the bright side, we are in "the system" and don't need to go back again. I will update my charts with the office by fax, and if there is a need for transport (which we don't plan on, of course, but for which we want to be prepared), I should slide into things at the hospital without a bunch of hullabaloo about "not having prenatal care."

Speaking of prenatal care, a couple days after the aforementioned 2 hour wait/<10 minute appt, my midwife's assistant arrived at our home for a prenatal visit. We spent a lovely and mutually respectful hour+ together. We talked about what I'm eating, how I'm feeling, my diastatis, how the baby is lying, and a myriad of other things related to baby and me. We walked around the house and talked about plans for birth, advantages/disadvantages of our house layout, etc. We drank tea together as we chatted. When she left, I felt thoroughly "cared for." THAT is what I call prenatal care. And yes, there are numbers and notes on my chart ... probably in more categories than the Dr's office will know what to do with when I fax it to them.

In other news...

Stephen is definitely going through a stage where he is wanting to exert his will, so he's keeping us on our toes. At the same time, he continues to be such a delight! His imagination is going full-steam, and while he adores playing with his siblings, he also plays happily by himself, totally engrossed in a world of his own making. He particularly enjoys playing with the tub of horses.

The Blessings received five seasons of Daniel Boone on DVD for Christmas. We've been watching it at lunchtime a few times a week and finished Season 1 yesterday. I had never seen it before, so it's been an adventure for all of us.

Last night, Elanor mentioned that she had lost something and had looked all over for it. Stephen pipes up helpfully, "Did you look under the green couch?" "Yes." "Did you look under the gray couch?" "Yes, Stephen." :-)

I've been looking across the table/room/yard/etc lately and realizing that Davey, our eldest Blessing, who will turn 14 in June, is looking more like a young man and less like a "boy." This does funny things to my heart, but mostly makes me realize how much I like this young man.

Have I mentioned that we've finally figured out a laundry system that we can actually make work for us? It's nothing fancy, just a three-bag laundry sorter in the laundry room where all the Blessings' dirty clothes are deposited (two for darks, one for lights/whites), a white basket for light towels/sheets/blankets and a blue basket for dark towels/sheets/blankets. The four older Blessings have the responsibility of doing two loads of laundry from start to finish on "their" laundry day, picking whatever basket or bag is most in need of being done. Kate and Grace help fold and put away, and I need to start working with Kate on Fridays, working towards her having a laundry day as well. For some reason, this system seems to be one that we can make work, and the laundry room floor is no longer covered with dirty laundry 98% of the time.

Our guinea hens have started laying eggs! They actually lay them in the coop, which is wonderful for us. Hopefully as the weather warms they will continue to lay in the coop and not take to the fields as guineas are prone to do.

I finally finished getting our winter/Christmas decorations packed up and ready to go to the attic. They'll go up and perhaps the baby tubs will come down...

The taping seems to be working well for keeping my abdominal separation from worsening. I finally started doing pilates again a couple night ago, and am thankful to be back to it. At the same time, I have to admit... it's kickin' my tail! But that's a good thing.

We have our garden mostly planned out for this year and are eagerly awaiting the warming of the soil so that we can get started! We're going to be using principles from the book Weedless Gardening by Lee Reich. No tilling, established beds/paths, and lots of mulch, for which we've found a good and cheap source. I'm sure you'll be hearing more about it.

Speaking of the soil warming, I feel like I am blossoming as Spring moves in. I've enjoyed several days this week of sitting in the sunshine reading or working on a project. The warmer weather and the smell of spring is such a reminder of our Heavenly Father's faithfulness! Last night, I fell asleep to the rumble of thunder, the patter of rain on the roof, the occasional distant flash of lightening... and woke to the sound of birds chirping while the sunshine streamed in my window. Spring Bliss!

See Yesterday, my photo blog, for some recent pictures. I'll be updating it later today.

Cookie Day!

Wednesday was our 6th annual Cookie Day at the Missouri State Capitol, when families from around the state bake and package cookies and deliver them to the legislators in Jefferson City.

Here are our 24 packages of cookies:


And a close-up of the labels:


"Our" alcove next to Rep. Davis's office.

Families came here to get their assignment sheets, then moved out all over the capitol to deliver cookies, cheer, and a message of, "We love having legal midwives in Missouri. Please don't let that change!" 3,550 homemade cookies were delivered this year by 150 midwifery supporters. Great work!

We moved to this area just off the rotunda for lunch.

Jesse and Emily arranged for pizza delivery and folks were able to order ahead of time - it worked great! Samanda brought lots of drinks, which were most welcome. The above pictures were taken before the pizza or the crowds arrived.

The thing about which I'm always disappointed in myself on/after Cookie Day is the fact that I get so involved in what's going on that I forget to take pictures. The preceeding pictures are all ones that Jonathan was thoughtful enough to take. If it weren't for him, we wouldn't have any of Cookie Day events. Thanks Babe!

And here are some pictures I took on our way to the van around 3pm. The Missouri capitol is a beautiful building, and I would love to plan several hours someday to take pictures both inside and out.

Stages

Ann Voskamp shares some lovely thoughts on life-stages in how to assemble the parts of a life when beginnings end & kids grow up. To get the background to my thoughts below, read Ann's post first.

I've been there. Watched Jonathan take down the crib for what I thought was the last time. Sorted through and gotten rid of most of the baby clothes, saving only favorites and a few extra "just in case." Placed my desire for more children on the proverbial altar, and found peace and joy in acceptance of moving on to the next stage of our lives.

And now, I promise-swell.
Grateful for the unexpected, not having lost the lesson of acceptance.
His plans, not mine. For His glory and my good.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope. Rom 15:13

The Power of a Picture

Today, I read a beautiful and touching story of a mother's first hours and days with her newborn daughter Nella, whom she immediately recognized as having Down's Syndrome. A beautiful testament to unconditional love. I expected to be emotionally moved by the story, but I wasn't expecting the emotional journey-in-time I encountered.

Nine years ago this summer, our precious Kate was born. I told her birth story a while back (in six parts, starting here). My unexpected emotional journey-in-time was sparked by this simple picture, borrowed from Nella's birth story:


While I had somehow refrained from crying as I read this lovely birth story, when my eyes absorbed this picture, the tears started falling. I wanted to weep. I sputtered out something to Jonathan ... what I would have given to have had a setup like that when Kate was back in the hospital. He gently reminded me ... Babe, it's been eight years.

My head knew it was eight years ago, that time heals and God is good. But my heart was suddenly there again...

* Our first (and only, to date) hospital birth.
* The miraculous victory of the vaginal delivery of our transverse-to-breech baby ... in St. Louis.
* The illogic of the gestational age misdiagnosis ("The reason her hips are so loose is because she was a frank breech. We're only judging her to be 34 weeks gestation because her hips are so loose. Everything else looks like a 37 week gestation baby.")
* The successful manipulation by the hospital staff, particularly the pediatrician, to get us to to agree to what they thought was best, despite the fact that everything in us was screaming they were wrong.
* The extra days in the first hospital ... the loneliness of being stuck in a hospital room alone while my baby was alone in the nursery, of Jonathan needing to be gone taking care of our other Blessings, of longing for my newborn daughter in my arms and for the arms of my Mama around us both.

And then, the return to the hospital after a week at home, just hours after Jonathan had departed for a business trip...
* The kindness (and yet loneliness) of a friend I barely knew taking Kate and I to the hospital and dropping us off at the door... because there was no one else to do it.
* The bili-bed the nurses were so excited to see in use for the first time; the bed Kate and I hated.
* The hours of trying to find a comfortable position on the hospital bed that would allow me to at least touch my baby as she lay in the bili-bed.
* The CD the kind nurses brought in of music with a heartbeat in the background to try to soothe my baby... when what she needed to hear was my heart.
* The countless tears of longing and loneliness that Katie and I both cried through those two eternal days

There was also good in those days - the kindness of the hospital to provide cafeteria tickets for a mama who arrived in haste, with no money in her purse; the arrival of my Papa and Mama from Kansas on Sunday, just in time to take Kate and I back home; the faithfulness and unceasing love of my Heavenly Father; the eventual homecoming and health of our sweet baby. I don't mean to seem ungrateful for these blessings.

But as I looked at this picture and thought of how different the whole experience would have been if I could have only held my precious baby under the bili-lights, I was once again that lonely and hurting new mother.


If you've stuck with me through my need to re-process this experience, thank you. The suddenness and intensity of my emotions today makes me more understanding of how things that happened years ago and that have been "dealt with" can come rushing in on someone.

God is good, and He is the great Healer. Even of wounds that get ripped open when you least expect it.

Katie's Birth Story -
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, The Power of a Picture

Baking Fun

Jonathan got me this wonderful mixer for Christmas. Doesn't it remind you of the tail light of a '60-something Chevy? I love it!

I also love that I've started making bread again, thanks to this strong reliable mixer and its dough hooks. I just can't handle kneading bread, and this does the hard part while allow me to do the fun stuff. The above shot was on New Year's Day. I was working on my "first" batch of bread while playing Apples to Apples Bible Edition with the boys.

Here's my second batch of bread. Should've gotten it out a little earlier, but it is still very yummy.


Also yesterday, I brought Katie "alongside" and she helped me make this Cranberry Crunch for dessert. She really did most of the work, and it was such fun to do it together. She even let two of her siblings go ahead of her in line for computer time because she was enjoying her time in the kitchen so much (she and Grace also helped me make quiche for supper).

Mama Stuff

Stacy at Your Sacred Calling has a great post up today about Kiddos in the Kitchen. Before you read on here, I'd love it if you'd go take a look, and be sure to read the article she links to at Like a Warm Cup of Coffee.

Done? Good stuff, wasn't it?

The whole "Did he know what He was doing when He gave them me?" question resonates with me (and probably most moms) deeply. I've spent a lot of time beating myself up for my failures instead of accepting His forgiveness and moving on in HIS strength. But He keeps working on me, and it's wonderful to know that His grace covers my mistakes, failures, impatience, etc.

On the kiddos in the kitchen business...
I have long admired and desired the parenting "model" that brings your children alongside you as you work through the day. It made sense and it sounds so lovely (two links there). But man oh man, it seems so hard to do! (Listens for the Amens) So I continue to desire to live with my children alongside me, and keep looking for ways to make that workable for me.

Here's how my efforts have often gone in the past. I have something to do, think it would be something with which the Blessings could help. I gather them around, thinking what a fun and bonding experience this will be. 30 minutes later, the project is complete, I feel like I should be half bald from pulling my hair out, and I go to take a nap wondering, "Why do I even try?" A couple months later, I might get the courage to try again.

That probably doesn't sound at all familiar, does it?

Well, first of all, I've been working lately on my heart attitude toward my Blessings. You know I don't call them that just because I think it's cute, don't you? The world around me needs to know that my children are viewed as Blessings. And me? I need the reminder! Yet it is so easy to fall into viewing them as burdens instead of blessings, and I'm continually needing to ask the Lord to give me HIS heart toward my children.

Another very practical thing I've realized is that it just doesn't work to bring all seven of my Blessings alongside me at the same time! The goal of bringing them alongside as I work dovetails beautifully with my (also often unrealized) goal of spending time with them one-on-one. So lately, I've been working on remembering to call them to me one or two at a time to help with something.

This has been a great help when it comes to special projects as well. We made gift jars for Christmas presents this year (something I plan to post about separately), and I had them help in teams of two. Each team helped me put togetehr a batch of 6 gift jars. Stephen "helped" on more than one team. Similarly, when we made edible Christmas trees, it was just two or three at a time at the counter.

So while this is a cute pictures of the Blessings and their trees,

I realized while reading the aforementioned blogs that they're not a realistic view of how those trees happened, and I don't want to add to anyone's Mama complex by presenting a false view!
They happened like this:

and this:

one, two, or (at most) three Blessings at a time. Then when they were all done, time for a fun picture, then the eating!

So what I'm trying to say through all my sputtering is this: Take heart, fellow Mamas! Keep stepping along with baby steps, seeking the next thing you are to do, treasure your Blessings, and know that God's grace covers you and them when you fail. And don't forget that one of the greatest gifts you can give your cbildren is for them to see you honoring, respecting, and loving your man!

Christmas Day Fun

Here are some collages of our Christmas day fun. A few things I wish I had pictures of... our times together reading the story of Christmas and singing, the lovely Winterberry teapot that Dad and Mom Smith bought me, and evidence that our dear friend Georgia had Christmas dinner with us. It was a lovely day!

Birthday Bashes, Round 3 - Davey

Last Saturday, Davey turned 13! We normally have small family birthday parties, but he had requested to have some families over for dinner and some guys to spend the night, and we gave it the green light. You only turn 13 once, right?

I forgot about the camera until it was time for cake, but we had a mini Mexican buffet at Davey's request: Beef enchiladas with green ench. sauce, beef and chicken ench. with red sauce, and chicken ench. with chipotle cream sauce (oh mercy, that was the crowning glory of the evening, at least, as far as my tastebuds were concerned), black bean salsa (mmmmmm good), chips, and applesauce. I was reminded, mid-afternoon on Friday, in the midst of making over 40 enchiladas, of just how much I love to cook - I had a blast!

Here's Davey careening around the corner, headed somewhere fun, I'm sure. Grace is curled up on Mike's lap in the background, next to Ellie & Maggie:


The birthday boy had requested a chocolate cake, and I made a pineapple upside down cake as well to be sure we'd have enough. I think everyone had sufficient dessert!


Some other fun pictures of friends and family. I didn't do as thorough a job as I like of making sure I had pics of everyone, but I guess we were too busy having fun to worry about it!


And this one of Davey with his buddy Nate was too good to not show by itself:


We're not much for sleepovers, and most of the families we're close to here aren't either, so the fact that Davey got to have a sleepover was a big deal. Sleepover is definitely a misnomer, though, because I don't think any of the boys got more than a couple hours of sleep. They camped out "in" a tent out back, and they also got to move out our little firepit. They enjoyed roasting some marshmallows, and they sat around the fire talking all night long!

I played short-order egg cook Saturday morning, and Barak and I made some biscuits. I thought it was a good sign that the guys all were having a great time when they jumped up and ran back outside for more fun as soon as they finished breakfast.



It was noon-ish before we loaded everyone up and took off to take the fellas home. We enjoyed sweet fellowship with their families when we dropped them off. As you can see, we were all pretty tired when we headed home:


I think Davey thoroughly enjoyed his birthday celebration, and we felt blessed to get to celebrate with precious friends. Happy Birthday, Davey! You are truly a blessing to our family!

Grace's Birth - Part II - Happy Birthday, Grace!

(Note – One of the wonderful things about my midwives is that they have given me copies of their detailed notes from my births. I love looking back through them and get another perspective, especially regarding time. Once I get in the zone, I lose track of time, so until I can find Grace's birth records, her birth story will have little in the way of time references.)

Although I missed my family like crazy, I had a wonderful week working in the kitchen at camp during Leadership Training Camp. I even got to do devotions with the girls one night. It was a true joy and blessing to be able to invest in God's work at KBC while I awaited the beginnings of labor.

Friday night, I started feeling less and less comfortable. As I stood in the camp kitchen working on something for Saturday, I realized that I was having steady, but spaced out, contractions. I sat down to work, but the contractions didn't fade. After a while, I went to lay down in the nurse's room, and borrowed a cell phone on which to call Jonathan and say, “Drive, Babe, drive!”

My dear friend and second mom, Cheryl, drove me down to the Birth Inn that night, where I promptly got in bed to get as much rest as I could. Jonathan arrived early in the morning, and we both went to sleep after he arrived. My contractions had faded through the night, and we were both glad for the extra rest.

Saturday morning, we enjoyed making ourselves at home at the Birth Inn. It's not a birth center, but a real home with a terrific birthing room (with toilet, sink, couch that could be made into a bed, and huge jetted tub!). There is a beautiful family bedroom with an heirloom cradle, a couple of extra bedrooms for family or midwives, a comfortable and lovely living room which they also use for childbirth education classes and such, and a nice kitchen/dining area. It's intended to be used for one family at a time, and we really felt at home while we were there.



Now that Jonathan had arrived, I was more than ready for my contractions to start up again. Saturday afternoon, we walked and walked, first around the neighborhood, then around the mall, then to Aldi to get some food for our stay. The contractions would come and go, but nothing intense. I was so frustrated!! At the same time, I felt extremely thankful that Jonathan had had plently of time to get to Wichita. I was just hoping that it hadn't been a completely false alarm, with days (or weeks?) to go before Baby arrived. Kathy's wonderful assistant, Brenda, was a tremendous help to me with my attitude and perspective.

When Saturday night and Sunday morning passed without any developments, we decided to head back to camp to pick up the rest of my luggage. I had left with just an overnight bag, and with a new week of camp starting, I needed to move my stuff out of the way. We got to visit for a little while with a good friend of ours and his fiance, then headed for Wichita again.

I wonder if perhaps part of what was holding things up for my labor was a sense of unfinished business having left my stuff at camp, because on the way back to Wichita, my contractions started getting more serious. We called Kathy on the way and asked her to meet us at the Birth Inn.

A check showed that yes, things were starting to move along. I walked around the living room; I sat on the floor and sorted through baby things and chatted with Kathy's apprentices between contractions; and after a while I started gettng antsy for the tub. Kathy's general policy is to have moms wait until they're at least 5 cm before having them get in the tub, but I was sincerely requesting that they start filling it before then, because I could tell things were really starting to move along and I was looking forward to seeing how the water would ease the intensity of my labor.



I had never had the opportunity to labor in the water before, but had read a lot about it. I knew as soon as my feet hit the tub that I had found heaven on earth (at least for labor!). The water embraced and cushioned me. It muted the many incoming sensory messages, and allowed my body to focus on the business at hand. I could feel my uterus working, my cervix expanding, and yet I was amazingly comfortable.

The lights in the birthing room were dim; music I loved was playing on the CD player; Jonathan was sitting against the tub rubbing my back and neck, and chatting with me when I didn't need to focus on the contractions. I wish that I could find the word pictures to describe the warmth and comfort of that time in my labor. When I think about Grace's birth, I see/hear/feel the comfort of dim lights, the flow of water, my man next to me, calming music... It truly is one of the high points in my life. Bliss.

After a time, I needed to get up and use the toilet they had so wisely installed right next to the tub. I mentioned in passing to Jonathan that I was starting to feel a little bit “pushy,” but I didn't think anything was “imminent.” Jonathan was wise enough to go give our midwifery crew an update, and they came in to see how things were going. If I recall correctly, it was around 11.30, and I remember someone commenting that it looked like this baby wasn't going to make it in time to arrive on June 1st. It was only a few minutes since I had said nothing was imminent, but when I heard that comment I thought to myself, “Don't count on it.” My “pushy-ness” was intensifying quickly!

Sure enough, around 11.50, my body hit a “gotta push!!” contraction. It's amazing how much can happen in one contraction. I had a split second of panic, not sure that it was really time, and I don't know if the words “oh no!” were spoken out loud or only internally. The moment of panic quickly passed and I surrendered to the knowledge that my body had been made for the task at hand. My water broke and Grace's head was born, all in that same contraction. The rest of her followed quickly.

It was such a unique experience, actually giving birth in the water. Grace was so calm and quiet, and everything had a surreal feel. After we had had a few minutes to get to know each other, I got out of the tub (love that shower head with flexible hose!) and moved to the couch. We enjoyed bonding and getting to know Grace (who was a great nurser from the beginning), and eventually moving to the bedroom to get some rest. After pictures!

Jonathan, Grace, and I with our midwifery team:


We stayed at the Birth Inn for a couple nights, so that Kathy could check on Grace and I a few more times before we headed back to Missouri on Tuesday. Kathy was actually in the St. Louis area for Grace's two week check, which was a special treat.

I was so blessed to work with Kathy and Brenda for Grace's birth. They are a terrific team, whose strengths compliment each other perfectly. Kathy had asked what they could do to make this my best birth, and they did it. It was a wonderful experience, and made us sure that we had made the right choice to travel eight hours to work with a legal midwife in a home setting.

(Of course, we are thrilled that if we are blessed with another baby, there are now legal home birth midwives in Missouri, and more working towards their Certified Professional Midwife credential even as I type.)

Here's a picture of Grace with J's Grandma Hall, so you can see what she actually looked like as a newborn.


Happy Birthday, sweet Grace! You are such a living token of God's undeserved favor, and a beautiful reminder that through HIS grace we can have victory. We love you and are so very thankful that you are our precious daughter!